like you never existed

Bad Luck

2011-03-15T05:58:00.000-07:00

About two years ago I broke the mirror in a make up compact. Sunday I broke my (brand new!) bike mirror getting it up to my fifth floor apartment. Can the sentence for bad luck be served concurrently? Or do I have another 12 years to look forward to?

Summer fun

2011-03-02T14:46:00.000-08:00

Every year before summer I dramatically announce, "This is the summer of ____!!" Last year it was soccer, the year before tennis. It never fails that I do the thing like once, then bitch about not fulfilling my summer destiny. But this year is going to be different, because this is the summer of biking. Yeah, thats right. The flaw in previous summer fun was that I needed someone to do it with me. Inevitably I would talk someone into a tennis match, play terribly, and they never wanted to go again (how am I supposed to get better guys??). Lucky for me I can bike by myself. And I'm okay at it. And I get to buy a new bell because I broke mine last year with some overzealous ringing... this summer is going to be awesome.

It isn't just me that gets it...

2011-03-01T13:34:00.000-08:00

Me: Zach, do you want to go to a mustache

charity bar crawl thing?

Zach: I can't grow a mustache.

Me: Umm...you have a mustache right now.

Kim: Yeah, you need to shave that skanky thing. And get a haircut.

Me: You look like a molester.

Ideas

2011-02-23T13:44:00.000-08:00

Okay my one follower, what should I blog about?

*diet
*exercise
*ghosts
*bento
*life in general
*should I do a 30 before 30?? I doubt I could think of that many things!

What is up?

2010-11-28T14:10:00.000-08:00

I'm working on revamping my blog and starting over with a new concept. Hopefully it will be up and running soon!

Ratatouille

2009-03-05T07:46:00.000-08:00

Check out http://thirty-before-thirty.blogspot.com/ for the latest attempt at healthy recipes. It was great!

African Stew

2009-02-22T08:35:00.001-08:00

This was my first attempt at adding more veggies to my diet, and it was delicious! I found it online when I was searching for spinach recipes. Not only was it great, its pretty easy as well. I halved the original recipe, so here's what I did:

1 bag spinach
1 can diced tomatoes
1 onion
2 Tablespoons peanut butter

Chop the onion and cook it in oil until soft. Add can of tomatoes and cook about 5 minutes, stir occasionally. Add chopped spinach and cover, cook at medium heat for 5 minutes. While spinach is cooking thin the peanut butter with hot water until it is a smooth paste. Remove the lid and stir in peanut butter. Cook another 5 to 10 minutes.

When I make this again I might add some red pepper flakes and see how that goes.

Updates

2009-02-10T09:48:00.000-08:00

Earlier I said that I was going to keep track of the number of books I read this year with no goal in mind. This morning I decided to amend that. In my apartment I have two bookcases that are overflowing, and enough stacks on the floor to fill a third. I've decided to donate the ones I don't want to Planned Parenthood, and to really try to read the ones I've been meaning to get to. Hopefully I can ween it down to two appropriately filled bookcases.

The Mailman is still being a jerk. I didn't get any mail for about a week, then I got two pieces of mail addressed to "current resident". I have also received more mail for the person who doesn't live at my address, but none for me.

Taken

2009-02-02T08:05:00.000-08:00

I watched Taken yesterday, and it was great. Liam Neeson was awesome, there was tons of action, and a few things happened that were genuinely surprising. This was not a run of the mill action flick. Go see it.

The Mailman

2009-01-31T08:38:00.000-08:00

I am currently in a stand off with The Mailman. I recently started getting mail addressed to someone else, but with my address on it. On the first letter there was a post-it that said:
"If someone else is a this address their name needs to be added to the mailbox! - The Mailman"

I took the letter out and wrote "not at this address" on the post-it, then put it back in the mailbox. That was over a week ago and he hasn't taken it out yet. And he keeps continuing to deliver this guys mail to me. On every letter I write, "return to sender not at this address" but he WILL NOT take the letters.

So now I am checking my mail everyday, taking out whats for me and leaving the rest. My mailman is an asshole.

Update: I haven't received any mail since Friday, which is unusual. Could The Mailman be holding my mail hostage? Game on.

Thanks Renee

2009-01-15T08:49:00.000-08:00

I was listening to Morning Edition on my way to work this morning when I heard this:

Dear Mr. Obama,

My name is Christopher Tinajero. I live in a brick house. All my family needs is food. Whenever I get home and I'm hungry I cannot find anything. We can't go anywhere because we always have no gas to drive. My mama voted for you, Obama, because we are a big fan. When you won we went crazy. I would want you to take away guns so our people don't have to die.

Sincerely,

Christopher Garcia Tinajero

Could it be any sadder?

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=99088962

The Great Escape

2009-01-02T08:03:00.000-08:00

Over the holiday week I saw three movies, so I thought I would review them all in one post.

The first one I'll talk about is Doubt. I really liked this movie and would recommend that everyone see it. The acting was great of course, and even if you don't like the story it's worth seeing for Philip Seymour Hoffman's sermons alone. The plot revolves around whether or not his character has an inappropriate relationship with a twelve year old boy. I thought the ending was quite clear, but my cousin (who I saw it with), came to the opposite conclusion regarding his characters guilt. If you do see it be sure to let me know what you think.

I also saw The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. This was my least favorite of the three. The acting was good, but the movie was very long. I also find it frustrating that the characters are in love but do everything in their power to mess it up. People ruin their love lives enough in real life, I don't need to watch a three hour movie about it as well. If you see it could you explain the juxtaposition between the story and Hurricane Katrina? I don't get it.

Slumdog Millionaire was the best movie I have seem in a long time. It was well acted, beautifully shot, and had great music that really enhanced the story. The story itself was wonderful, and it was told in an interesting way. Unlike Benjamin Button, Jamal fought for his love and would have died for it, instead of giving up on everything he ever wanted.

Bar Story

2008-12-20T10:03:00.001-08:00

I was trying to sleep oh Thursday night, when I randomly remembered something that happened when I was a bartender five years ago. It's an unusual story so I thought I would share.

It must have been a Sunday night, because we were pretty slow and I was closing the bar by myself. I noticed an older man stumbling around by the doors, and I thought there might be trouble if he came and asked for a drink because I would have to tell him no. As I was thinking about this a women came to the bar and ordered two drinks. I got them for her and she called the man over. This pissed me off because I knew she knew I wouldn't serve him. I told my manager and she said just to keep an eye on them and let her know if anything happened.

The man was probably between 55 and 65. He was tall and fat with white scraggly hair and a Santa-ish beard. He had on overalls and a trucker hat. The women was in her 30's, pretty and well dressed. I never would have guessed that they were together. Well, I got distracted by some customers and the next time I looked over the man had blood pouring out of his mouth. He had broken the glass on his teeth, swallowed some, and kept drinking from the broken part totally unaware that anything was going on. The women was laughing. I called my manager to tell her what was going on, then pointed to the women and told her to get him out of the bar (I should probably point out that one of the least intimidating things ever is a 5'2 girl behind a 3 ft. bar- just not scary). She said something to me, and realizing that I didn't really feel like getting into it I made that universal bartender shrug of, "I don't get paid enough for this shit." My manager came out and her and the girl were going at it, with the guy just standing there still bleeding, still drinking. All three head toward the door as my manager escorts them out, and that is when the craziness happened. The guy stops walking, sways for a second, grabs my manager around the waist, and kisses her on the lips. Yeah, glass blood and all (she had to get tested for AIDS like every three months after that). The couple leaves and my manager locks herself in the office to cry for the next two hours.

Do you have your tickets?

2008-12-15T10:26:00.000-08:00

Calendar Of Events

Gun Show
Category: Gun

Admission: $6 Adults, $1 for Children ages 1-11

Event Days:
December 19, 2008
5:00 PM - 9:00 PM
December 20, 2008
09:00 AM - 5:00 PM
December 21, 2008
09:00 AM - 3:00 PM

Location:
4-H Exhibits Building

Contact Info:
Daryl Klein 1/888.552.1486

I am so there!

Life as we knew it

2008-12-15T08:52:00.001-08:00

Life as we knew it
by: Susan Beth Pfeffer

This book was recommended to me by a friend. All he said was that it's a teen book and he couldn't put it down. I was like; "OK, I'm sold!" I got it from the library and started reading. I soon realized that this was not an average teen story and was completely surprised by the plot.

I guess I will have to get into the plot a little, so if you don't want to know anything stop reading now!

So, the story begins with an average teenage girl. Her parents are divorced and she lives with her mom and younger brother in Pennsylvania. Her older brother it away at school. There is going to be an asteroid hitting the moon, and everyone is pretty excited about it. They go out to watch the event, but when the asteroid hits it changes the moons orbit, causing the tides and everything else controlled bu the moon to go out of control. This is bad. Again, I don't want to give to much away, but the rest of the story is about what the family does to survive without stores, gas, electricity, doctors, roads, basically everything.

That being said I should not have read this book. I am already teetering on the edge of doomsday hermit, and this was probably about enough to push me over. I read the tale of survival more as a how-to for when the time comes, not as the work of fiction it was intended to be. I'm trying to force myself not to stock up on canned goods, and am seriously considering getting a gun.

If you think you might like this book, but are interested in a more adult version, I would recommend:
The Road
by: Cormac McCarthy (soon to be a major motion picture!)

the one where I lack people skills

2008-12-08T08:17:00.000-08:00

Yesterday afternoon I was messing around in my kitchen when someone knocked on my door. As this has never happened in the two years I have lived here I almost fell off my chair. Then I jumped up and looked for a hiding place, realizing I was being totally irrational I then answered the door. It was my neighbor and the following conversation ensued:

Neighbor guy: "Hey, some friends are over making me dinner for my birthday and we need a cup of flour, do you have some?"
Me: "Happy Birthday!"
N" "Thanks"
Me: (sad voice) "Oh, Pearl Harbor day, bummer."
N: "Yeah..."
Me: "So I don't have any flour 'cause I have Celiacs"
N: ....
Me: "But I am making cookies soon, I'll stop by and give you some for your birthday."
N: "OK, sounds good"
Me: (firm) "I'll see you later then."
N: "See ya."

Needless to say I totally forgot to bring him cookies. This is why I don't speak to my neighbors.

The one where I fill out a lame survey

2008-12-01T11:33:00.000-08:00

A
- Available: Almost always
- Age: 26
- Annoyance: Most people
B
- Beer: Coors Light!
- Birthday: August 24th
- Blind or Deaf: Deaf
- Best weather: Fall-y, sunny and warm but not to hot.
- Been on stage?: In a 5th grade play where I mock Jesus the beggar boy? Yes. Ah, Catholic school...
- Believe in Santa: No, and I think it's dumb to tell children about it too. Creepy.

C
- Candy: Sixlet
- Color: Red/Pink/Orange
- Chocolate/Vanilla: Chocolate
- Chinese/Mexican: Food? Mexican I guess.
- Cake or pie: Neither :(
- Cheese: Sharp Cheddar, extra sharp. With wine
D
- Day or Night: Day
- Dance in the rain: Sing maybe? Or dance on your grave someday.
E
- Eyes: Brown. The old ladies can't get enough of them...
- Everyone's got: Issues
- Ever failed a class?: Yes, but I retook it and got an A.
F
- First thoughts waking up: Good morning merry sunshine.
- Food: Steak Burritos, it's kind of a problem.
G
- Greatest Fear: Someone I love dying, I don't care if I do.
- Goals: Graduate someday
- Gum: Bubble
- Get along with your parents?: Very much so.
H
- Hair Color: brown.
- Height: 5'2
- Happy: Go lucky
- Holiday: Labor day.
- How do you want to die: Asleep. Or killing terrorists.
I
- Ice Cream: I must confess I do not like ice cream. Unfortunate b/c it's one of the few deserts I can eat.
- Instrument: Zither
J
- Jewelry: The rings my grandpa gave me.
- Job: Student, baby-sitter.
K
- Kids: Probably not. If so there names will be Bruno and Robinson so they may prefer the never existing.
- Keep a journal?: No, I've tried in the past but I'm to suspicious. Even living alone.
L
- Love: Is just a four letter word
- Laughed so hard you cried: Yes, who hasn't?
M
- Milk flavor: I hate milk.
- Movies: So many.
- Motion sickness?: Yeah, I can't read in a moving car or watch home movies.
- McD’s or BK: McD's fries
N
- Number of Siblings: 2
- Number of Piercings: None really. At one point...10.
- Number: 24
O
- One wish: More wishes
P
- Perfect Pizza: Would be gluten free.
- Pepsi/Coke: Coke, from Mexico in a glass bottle
Q
- Quail: Eggs, in a can at Asian Grocery?
R
- Reason to cry: Movies
- Reality T.V.: Is "real"
- Radio Station: 101.7, 1350 KRNT (Cubbies)
S
- Song(s): Disco Inferno
- Salad Dressing: Bleu Cheese
- Sushi: Yum.
- Skipped school: Not to much
- Slept outside: In a tent
- Smoked?: Cigarettes, Cigars, a Hookah.
- Skinny dipped?: No
- Shower daily?: Yes. No if I can get away with it.
- Sing well?: No
- In the shower?: Not really
- Strawberries/Blueberries: Strawberries/Blueberries. Blueberries are more fun to pick.

T
-Tattoos?: Four, and I have two ideas going around.
- Time for bed: 9:00 in a perfect world (hey I get up at 5)
- Thunderstorms: Are awesome if I don't have to go outside.
U
- Unpredictable: I'm the wildcard
V
- Vacation spot: I have a list.
W
- Weakness: Almost anything, I lack willpower
- Which one of your friends acts the most like you: Patrick or course
- Who makes you laugh the most: Myself
- Worst feeling: Letting people down
- Where do we go when we die?: No where. That's it.
- Worst Weather?: Super cold
X
- X-Rays: Are radiation-packed good times!
- Ex's: Are people too.
Y
-Year it is now: 2008
-Yellow: Can be cool or garish.
Z
- Zoo animal: I hate seeing animals in cages.

The one where books are listed

2008-11-26T16:55:00.000-08:00

USA TODAY's Best-Selling Books List Top 150 books of the last 15 years:

1 Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone J.K. Rowling, art by Mary GrandPre

2 Dr. Atkins' New Diet Revolution Robert C. Atkins

3 The Da Vinci Code Dan Brown

4 Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows J.K. Rowling, art by Mary GrandPre

5 Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix J.K. Rowling, art by Mary GrandPre

6 Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince J.K. Rowling, art by Mary GrandPre

7 Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets J.K. Rowling, art by Mary GrandPre

8 Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban J.K. Rowling, art by Mary GrandPre

9 Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire J.K. Rowling, art by Mary GrandPre

10 Who Moved My Cheese? Spencer Johnson

11 The South Beach Diet Arthur Agatston

12 Tuesdays With Morrie Mitch Albom

13 Angels & Demons Dan Brown

14 What to Expect When You're Expecting Heidi Murkoff, Arlene Eisenberg, Sandee Hathaway

15 The Purpose-Driven Life Rick Warren

16 The Five People You Meet in Heaven Mitch Albom

17 The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People Stephen R. Covey

18 The Kite Runner Khaled Hosseini

19 Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus John Gray

20 The Secret Rhonda Byrne

21 Rich Dad, Poor Dad Robert T. Kiyosaki with Sharon L. Lechter

22 To Kill a Mockingbird Harper Lee

23 Don't Sweat the Small Stuff ... And It's All Small Stuff Richard Carlson

24 The Secret Life of Bees Sue Monk Kidd

25 Eat, Pray, Love Elizabeth Gilbert

26 Twilight Stephenie Meyer

27 The Notebook Nicholas Sparks

28 The Memory Keeper's Daughter Kim Edwards

29 The Catcher in the Rye J.D. Salinger

30 Memoirs of a Geisha Arthur Golden

31 A New Earth Eckhart Tolle

32 Oh, the Places You'll Go! Dr. Seuss

33 The Four Agreements Don Miguel Ruiz

34 Angela's Ashes Frank McCourt

35 The Lovely Bones Alice Sebold

36 Body-for-Life Bill Phillips, Michael D’Orso

37 New Moon Stephenie Meyer

38 Night Elie Wiesel, translations by Marion Wiesel and Stella Rodway

39 Chicken Soup for the Soul Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen

40 The Greatest Generation Tom Brokaw

41 Breaking Dawn Stephenie Meyer

42 The Celestine Prophecy James Redfield

43 Wicked Gregory Maguire

44 Good to Great Jim Collins

45 Eclipse Stephenie Meyer

46 Eragon Christopher Paolini

47 Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood Rebecca Wells

48 Your Best Life Now Joel Osteen

49 In the Kitchen With Rosie Rosie Daley

50 Simple Abundance Sarah Ban Breathnach

51 A Child Called It Dave Pelzer

52 A Million Little Pieces James Frey

53 The Testament John Grisham

54 Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen, Kimberly Kirberger

55 Deception Point Dan Brown

56 The Alchemist Paulo Coelho

57 Marley & Me John Grogan

58 Dr. Atkins' New Carbohydrate Gram Counter Robert C. Atkins

59 Life of Pi Yann Martel

60 The Brethren John Grisham

61 The South Beach Diet Good Fats Good Carbs Guide Arthur Agatston

62 The Innocent Man: Murder and Injustice in a Small Town John Grisham

63 For One More Day Mitch Albom

64 The Polar Express Chris Van Allsburg

65 The Great Gatsby F. Scott Fitzgerald

66 The Last Lecture Randy Pausch, Jeffrey Zaslow

67 What to Expect the First Year Arlene Eisenberg, Heidi Murkoff, Sandee Hathaway

68 Love You Forever Robert Munsch, art by Sheila McGraw

69 Green Eggs and Ham Dr. Seuss

70 A Painted House John Grisham

71 The Rainmaker John Grisham

72 Skipping Christmas John Grisham

73 Cold Mountain Charles Frazier

74 The Curious Incident of the Dog In the Night-Time Mark Haddon

75 Life Strategies Phillip C. McGraw

76 Seabiscuit: An American Legend Laura Hillenbrand

77 The Summons John Grisham

78 Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil John Berendt

79 The Hobbit J.R.R. Tolkien

80 The Runaway Jury John Grisham

81 Goodnight Moon Board Book Margaret Wise Brown, art by Clement Hurd

82 The Perfect Storm Sebastian Junger

83 Snow Falling on Cedars David Guterson

84 The Giver Lois Lowry

85 Embraced by the Light Betty J. Eadie

86 The Chamber John Grisham

87 You: On A Diet Michael F. Roizen, Mehmet C. Oz

88 The Prayer of Jabez Bruce Wilkinson

89 Holes Louis Sachar

90 Digital Fortress Dan Brown

91 The Shack William P. Young

92 The Devil Wears Prada Lauren Weisberger

93 Water for Elephants Sara Gruen

94 A Thousand Splendid Suns Khaled Hosseini

95 The Seat of the Soul Gary Zukav

96 Chicken Soup for the Woman's Soul Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen, Jennifer Read Hawthorne, Marci Shimoff

97 The Partner John Grisham

98 Lord of the Flies William Golding

99 Eldest: Inheritance, Book II Christopher Paolini

100 The Broker John Grisham

101 The Street Lawyer John Grisham

102 A Series of Unfortunate Events No. 1: The Bad Beginning Lemony Snicket

103 The Poisonwood Bible Barbara Kingsolver

104 Into the Wild Jon Krakauer

105 The King of Torts John Grisham

106 The Tipping Point Malcolm Gladwell

107 The Horse Whisperer Nicholas Evans

108 Hannibal Thomas Harris

109 The Audacity of Hope Barack Obama

110 Running With Scissors Augusten Burroughs

111 The Glass Castle: A Memoir Jeannette Walls

112 My Sister's Keeper Jodi Picoult

113 The Last Juror John Grisham

114 The Devil in the White City Erik Larson

115 Left Behind Tim LaHaye, Jerry B. Jenkins

116 America (The Book) Jon Stewart and The Writers of The Daily Show

117 The Red Tent Anita Diamant

118 John Adams David McCullough

119 The Christmas Box Richard Paul Evans

120 The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants Ann Brashares

121 Sugar Busters! H. Leighton Steward, Sam S. Andrews, Morrison C. Bethea, Luis A. Balart

122 Blink Malcolm Gladwell

123 The Power of Now Eckhart Tolle

124 90 Minutes in Heaven: A True Story of Death and Life Don Piper, Cecil Murphey

125 The Fellowship of the Ring J.R.R. Tolkien

126 1776 David McCullough

127 The Bridges of Madison County Robert James Waller

128 Where the Heart Is Billie Letts

129 The Ultimate Weight Solution Phillip C. McGraw

130 Protein Power Michael R. Eades, Mary Dan Eades

131 Chicken Soup for the Mother's Soul Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen, Jennifer Read Hawthorne, Marci Shimoff

132 Into Thin Air Jon Krakauer

133 Middlesex Jeffrey Eugenides

134 Three Cups of Tea Greg Mortenson, David Oliver Relin

135 You: The Owner's Manual Michael F. Roizen, Mehmet C. Oz

136 1,000 Places to See Before You Die: A Traveler’s Life List Patricia Schultz

137 Self Matters Phillip C. McGraw

138 She's Come Undone Wally Lamb

139 1984 George Orwell

140 The Chronicles of Narnia C.S. Lewis

141 The Millionaire Next Door Thomas J. Stanley, William D. Danko

142 The Other Boleyn Girl Philippa Gregory

143 The Zone Barry Sears, Bill Lawren

144 The Pilot's Wife Anita Shreve

145 The Lost World Michael Crichton

146 Atonement Ian McEwan

147 He's Just Not That Into You Greg Behrendt, Liz Tuccillo

148 Fahrenheit 451 Ray Bradbury

149 The World Is Flat Thomas L. Friedman

150 Cross James Patterson

http://www.usatoday.com/life/books/news/2008-10-29-top-150-books_N.htm

I have only read 45 of these, which seems low. I have heard of them all, some just don't intrest me I guess. How many have you read? Are there any on the list you would recomend?

The one where I diss Oprah

2008-11-26T10:22:00.000-08:00

Last night I had a negative knee jerk reaction when someone mentioned a book they had recently read and enjoyed. I have not read this book, but I have already formed an opinion about it based on one person. Oprah. This book happens to be her current book club pick. I have a strong dislike for reading Oprah books, which is irrational because she usually picks good books. I just feel like such a lame follower whenever I read one.

Also I will never forgive her for picking East of Eden when I was about halfway through it. Thanks for almost ruining Steinbeck for me Oprah!

So, yeah to Oprah for getting people excited about reading, but for now I'll pick my own books.

Ack!

2008-11-26T09:41:00.000-08:00

I called my mom on the way to work this morning to see how her Thanksgiving prep was going. The following conversation ensued:

Me: "How's the cooking going?"
Her: "Not good. The turkey has some sort of metal rod in it holding it together and I can't get it out.
Me: "That's really gross."
Her: "I know. Hey, do you think you could stop by before work and try to break the neck so I can get the rod out?"
Me: Screaming
Then I hang up.

Happy Thanksgiving

woe is me

2008-11-18T09:12:00.001-08:00

I am not meant to be in a relationship. It's not sad so don't pity me, it's just a fact. Whenever one ends I'm amazed to realize how much I like myself and like being alone. When most people get dumped they spend a lot of time wondering why. What was wrong with me? They moan, Why didn't he like me? I'm like this: "Oh wait, this is me? Long time no see, I forgot how awesome you are!"

But seriously, I love being alone. I love not having to tell anyone in the world where I am or what I'm doing. I love not having to do dishes or clean if I don't want to. I love flaking out on plans with no explanation, deciding to do things on a whim without having to consult with a significant other, staying up until 2:00 in the morning watching Veronica Mars, or going to bed at 7:30 if I feel like it.

Does that mean I don't ever want to find someone to settle down with? No. I just have it pretty good right now. I might settle down someday, but I'll never just settle.

Can I have the envelope please?

2008-11-14T05:54:00.000-08:00

And the winner of the first annual funniest person I know award goes to....ME! Oh my god I was not expecting this!

To those of you who feel like you should have received this years award, get over it. You obviously aren't funny enough. So plaster on a fake smile and clap politely while I make my acceptance speech.

"This is such a surprise, thank you everyone. There are so many people. First I want to thank my mom. You taught me sarcasm, the proper use of eye rolling, and most importantly the ability to laugh at people who hurt themselves. Yes, while most parents instilled their children with compassion and empathy, not you. Thank you. And my dad. You taught me off color jokes, the importance of knowing your audience, and the way a well placed swear word can add emphasis. Thank you. To my extended family- thank you for being so ridiculous. After spending time at family gatherings we would go home with hours of priceless material to amuse ourselves with. Thank you for being you.

Next I would like to thank The Simpsons for the word Jeebus, hilarious. And Super troopers for, well everything. To Catholic school for instilling me with large amounts of guilt and self loathing, without which no one is truly funny."

[Music Starts]

"Oh no, I'm not done. Okay okay, I need to thank the most important person off all, without whom this would not have been possible, me. I could not have done this without my incredible wit and good humor. Thank you, me, for being who you are."

What would you do?

2008-10-29T16:52:00.000-07:00

I am at work and I just had a feeling like I got punched in the stomach. Looking at projected election outcomes it hit me, what would I do if Obama lost? In 2000 and 2004 I had high hopes of moving to Canada. This year I have nothing. I literally cannot imagine how I would react.

FYI

2008-10-27T07:54:00.000-07:00

Don't wear a hat when there are 60MPH winds outside. It's just not a good idea.

If you want to make me cry show me a story about someone who died or lost everything because they got sick and didn't have health insurance. It makes me feel the perfect combination of sad, angry, and helpless. This can lead to awkwardness, like yesterday when I was at the gym on the treadmill and Sunday Morning did a story. Also when I saw Sicko and everyone in the theater responded with the appropriate amount of laughter/frustration, while I was sobbing the whole time.

It's never easy to bring up a difficult subject. No matter how many times you practice a conversation in your head, or if you try to convince yourself not to talk about it, it will eventually get said. I usually end up blurting things out at inappropriate times, then having to pick up the pieces later.

Don't eat uncooked food at restaurants, you will get food poisoning. It is not cool.

Get Smart

2008-10-22T13:24:00.000-07:00

My campus has a new building that is very technology oriented. Lights are motion censored, smart boards are used, very 21st century. I have had a class in there all semester after spending most of my college career in a building full of chalkboards. This is a big change.

Last night I started a new class in another building that I haven't really been in before. I got there early to work on the computer, but the room was dark. Seeing that the room was full of computers, and did in fact have a smart board, I figured they must be motion lights. I started walking around hoping the lights would pop on, but they did not. Sighing I set down my tea and bag and jumped around where I thought the sensor might be. Nothing. Then I actually said aloud, "stupid smart room." I went to another building only to discover the computers were down. Maybe that's why the lights didn't come on, I thought, maybe it's all connected. I went back to my building and stood around in the hallway, as opposed to sitting alone in an empty dark room. Another student entered the room and I watched eagerly to see how he would react. He reached over and flicked on the light switch.

Testify!

2008-10-22T10:47:00.000-07:00

I am sick of Honey Crisp apples. They are gross but everyone falls over them like manna from heaven. Today I went to the store for some much loved Fuji's and there were none. Why? Because there was a complete aisle of Honey Crisps. I hate them.

I am giving money to Iowa Public Radio tomorrow. I must. I cannot take the guilt any longer. Okay okay, it's free! it's awesome! you need money to turn on the lights! I'll give what I can, and you guys should as well.

Race for the Cure is Saturday. If your running, awesome! If you can't that's okay too, just try to do something for Breast Cancer Awareness month. Cancer sucks.

Full Circle

2008-10-17T06:24:00.000-07:00

I do not watch television news. I listen to NPR every morning, and check internet news sites throughout the day. If you know me, then you are aware I hate hearing about weather and rely solely on the weather beacon for updates. One of the reasons I hate local news is that everything has to relate back to Iowa. Every flimsy Iowa link to world events is touted and discussed ad nauseam. It's ridiculous.

That being said, I am now going to tout my flimsy link to the Philadelphia Phillies. Hooray for hypocrisy! Not being able to root for the Yankees, the Cubs, or the Dodgers left me in a bind. I love baseball, and I desperately want to care about who wins the series. Right now my biggest concern is Boston not being in it, but hopefully that won't be a problem for long. Now, why am I rooting for the Phillies? They are the reason I love baseball.

In 1993 I was 11. I don't remember paying much attention to baseball, or particularly caring about it at all. For some reason my family got swept up in that series. Probably my dad was watching it and we all just got hooked. A bitter rivalry formed. My sister, dad, and I were for the Phillies. We laughed and cheered, and Dykstra was our hero. My mom and brother were for Toronto. We mocked them. When the Phillies lost my sister cried and my brother got a Toronto hat he would wear for the next ten years. I learned how much you can care about something you didn't even know existed the week before.

Simple equation

2008-10-14T14:01:00.000-07:00

Tons of schoolwork + hatred of my job = an inability to be witty/creative in blog land.

I live for this

2008-10-02T08:43:00.000-07:00

Baseball.

I am a stranger in an unholy land. This is my first playoff season without my beloved Yankees. I won't skip school to watch the game, sit in bars on weeknights drinking pitchers with my dad, or have that feeling of nervous excitement at every pitch, every out. Is it October? How can it be. And where is Jeter? My Mr. October, Mr. November.

I am still paying attention, of course. My second favorite team, those lovable Cubs just might make it this year. And I'm rooting for them, even though it would be nice to see Torre's Dodgers win it all. A kind of fuck you Steinbrenner.

I hope the Cubs win it all, but I'll settle for anyone as long as it isn't Boston. Fucking Red Sox.

Read Banned Books

2008-09-30T09:04:00.000-07:00

"It's such a vicious and dangerous thing to begin," she wrote. "Besides, banning books is so utterly hopeless and futile. Ideas don't die because a book is forbidden reading."
-librarian Gretchen Knief

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=95190615

Oh yeah, I'm a dork

2008-09-24T16:44:00.000-07:00

This weekend I was at my parents looking through old pictures. I need a picture for work and it's supposed to be from high school, but younger staff can use one from age ten on to make it harder to guess. Going through the box of photos I noticed that from the age of five to around sixteen there were no pictures of me. None. I was giving my parents a hard time because there seemed to be tons of my siblings, what's the deal? (This might be a good time to mention that I have a textbook case of middle child syndrome). They looked at me like I was crazy and my dad said, "You never wanted to be in them, you were so shy." I kinda yeah whatevered them and forgot about it.

This morning, I'm brushing my teeth listening to the radio and all of a sudden I was like; oh my god as a child I got grounded twice. From reading. I am a huge dork. How could I forget my shy nerdish roots? Maybe it's the fact that somewhere along the way reading, documentaries, NPR, and PBS became cool. At least to me. Or maybe I found the right balance of extrovert to mix in with my true loner self. Or it could just be that I grew up, and stopped giving a shit about what other people think.

Che cazzo?

2008-09-23T05:23:00.000-07:00

In class last Thursday we were talking about how women influence media and culture, and how culture influences women. After talking about plastic surgery and celebrities we started talking about make-up. After a student brought up that make-up is now marketed to girls as young as six or seven this is what my (female) professor said:

"When I was growing up in the Bronx the only girls that wore make-up before they were in their late teens were the Italians. (Pause) And they were fast. (Longer Pause) Sorry Libby."

What am I supposed to say to that?

New York, New York

2008-09-22T08:19:00.000-07:00

I'll miss you.

Ha.

2008-09-16T12:17:00.000-07:00

I post so rarely it's starting to look like I no longer exist. Sorry, but due to school and some health issues I haven't really had the time or humor to post lately. Hopefully things will calm down soon. Hope you miss me.

Pour some sugar on me

2008-09-09T18:06:00.000-07:00

Last Saturday might have been the most wholesome day I have had in awhile. As this is obviously rare, I thought I should document it.

The day began walking to the farmers market at 7:00 in the morning with my friend. There we consumed the most delicious food ever created: Pupusas.

Thanks El Salvador!

While at the market we discovered that it was the last day of the year to pick blueberries, and they closed at noon! We walked home and after a brief garage sale detour we were on our way.
Photographic evidence:

MMMM...blueberries.

After cleaning up we headed to the East Village for disappointing art and delicious Vegetarian Dolmathes.

Finally my friend spotted this sign and we could not stop laughing.

Finally this town is getting chocolate milk! What took so long?

Hello Random

2008-09-09T08:41:00.000-07:00

Everyone who can should go vote today, I know you don't think it's a big deal, but it is! Just do or else the terrorists win.

I've busted out my grandma sweater. If you see me between now and March sorry, but I am cold.

I didn't get my homework done.

Reading anti-abortion billboards out loud is hilarious, due to the fact they are prone to exclamation points. Try it. What!! Embryos are tiny babies!!

My friend is marrying someone I loathe. What could be more depressing?

Off the market?

2008-09-04T10:36:00.000-07:00

I previously posted about wearing an engagement ring to work as a deterrent to being hit on by creepy guys. I considered it, but then decided against it.

Last weekend my grandfather gave me a very pretty engagement ring that was his grandmothers. I have been wearing it on my right ring finger. The last two days I've had moments where I feel like a guy has looked at me and seen the ring. Does an engagement ring on your right hand have meaning? Should I not be wearing it? Guy's what would you think if you saw this?

$%^#!

2008-09-04T05:20:00.000-07:00

I watched the RNC last night. I must be suicidal because seeing it almost made me have a stroke/heart attack, yet I watched anyway. I hate Sarah Palin. I hate Rudy Giuliani. Watching Palin speak caused me to scream at the TV, forgetting I live in an apartment. I yell hilarious things too, such as, "you bitch, that is factually inaccurate!"

I also took some photos to give you a chance to see that I am not exaggerating about my TV:

And to show Ms. Palin how I really feel:

Boring

2008-09-03T16:21:00.000-07:00

I have a lot going on right now but none of it is very interesting.
Here's my average weekly schedule:

Monday: work 8:15-5:15
Tuesday: work 8:15-5:15, school: 5:45-10:25
Wednesday: work 9:00-1:30, school 2:00-2:50, work 3:45-8:15
Thursday: work 8:15-5:15, school: 5:45-10:25
Friday or Saturday: work

During the week I'm pretty much school/work focused, which sucks. Today I managed to wake up at 5:30 so I could go to the gym for 20 minutes. Woo Hoo!

Project 1- Nature

2008-08-28T19:21:00.000-07:00

I am taking digital photography, so I thought I would post the pictures that I turn in each class. Our first assignment was to take nature photos. Let me know what you think.

digital doom

2008-08-28T11:35:00.000-07:00

My TV is eight years old. It has a VCR built into it. I get four channels with an antenna that only has one ear (anteni?). I'm okay with this. But now everywhere you turn its February this, digital converter box that. I decided not to get one and just be TVless, whatever. Then I got a coupon and it was only $10.00, so I went and got one. The big selling point was that the box comes with a remote. I do not have a TV remote, just one for the DVD player. This will be important later.

So, my dad ordered the coupon and I went and picked it up yesterday before work. After work I decided to install it. Problem one: I need a power strip. Four things can't be plugged in to two jacks people! No big deal, easily fixable. I breeze through instillation lalala, this is SO easy, I'm a technological wizard! Now just turn the sucker on. Problem two: To set it up the TV must be turned to channel 3. My channel 3 is not programmed. I have no remote. OK, I start pushing buttons on the front of the TV. Menu, yes! Add/Delete channels, yes please! Problem three: Delete is the default, and I cannot get it to go to add. Why won't it go to add?

Conclusion: I cannot get my converter box to work. And I accidentally deleted channel 8 in all the confusion. In my quest to get more channels I now get less.

Dream on

2008-08-27T06:47:00.000-07:00

School started last night. I'm sure I'll get into details about my classes soon, but for now I wanted to talk about a side effect of classes that I had forgotten about until last night. I have class from 5:45-10:30 on Tuesday and Thursday evenings. I usually try to go to bed soon after getting home. As a result of my brain being "on" for so many hours before bed, I tend to have very strange vivid dreams. I totally forgot about it until I woke up this morning. So, I'm going to talk about my dream. Disclaimer: it was a dream!

I was in a car with my parents and brother and we were driving through a cemetery. We went up a hill and came upon this strange excavation site. There were lots of people working, and tons on bodies in body bags. Somehow I came to the conclusion that the people were Mormons and were digging up bodies in order to baptise them. (They do (did?) do this). I started taking pictures, thinking it was crazy that this was going on with such little security, and how did they get the permission to do this? They saw what I was doing and stopped our car. They searched and searched for the camera and kept questioning us. We finally got to leave. They continued to look for my camera, coming to my house to do a search there, and following me around. I decided not to say anything to anyone about it because, even though it enraged me, who was I to be responsible for the persecution of a religion based on one crazy sect? Very noble. But then they did something that really pissed me off (no idea what), and the gloves came off. Now, I could have sent the pictures to the local paper, or called the news, but that would be rational and this was a dream. So what did I do? I somehow contacted the Taliban (phonebook?) and told them that Mormons were baptising Muslims. They were not happy. Next thing I know the cemetery was bombed and it was all over. Very strange.

I have no idea what to make of this, but I've been thinking about it all morning so I thought I would share.

And so it begins.

2008-08-20T10:44:00.001-07:00

School mockery time. So I had to stop by the old GVC this morning to talk to a professor about a class I'm going to be a peer leader for. It went well, but afterwards I was hoping to meet up with my advisor to ask a few questions. Ha.

He, I'll call him Jude, is a little kooky. Hilariously awesome, but kooky none the less. Good quality in friends and maybe an uncle, not so much in someone whose job it is to advise you on important academic decisions. Now, to his credit my inability to locate him isn't his fault. See, GVC decided to build this new building, they made the professors from two other buildings box up all of their belongings with the promise this new building would be ready by August. It isn't. So, these professors have no office, no phones, no computers, basically nothing. Not the best situation five days before classes begin.

Anyway, I'm in the library and I ask another homeless professor if she has seen Jude around, she hasn't. She asks why and I tell her I want to add/drop a class. She tells me to run and get a form and she'll sign it (I don't think she's supposed to do that). So I head out the door. Seconds later she's running after me, she scribbles her signature and tells me to sign it for her (we are really not supposed to do that).

So, before classes even begin I learned my first lesson: forgery.

There's nothing happening here...

2008-08-19T13:14:00.000-07:00

I would like to post, but not much is going on right now.

I'm getting ready for school to start, so that means: expensive book purchases, frantic calls to professors and advisers, yelling at the business and financial aid office employees, new parking sticker, and meetings meetings meetings! Blog land will be very happy when school does start, because the losers I go to school with are ridiculously easy to mock. And I lost all of my best classmates to the real world, so I will have a plethora of material and no one to share it with.

The Fair

2008-08-15T13:04:00.000-07:00

I stopped by the fair yesterday morning- my first time this year. I love it. Here are some things you only see/do at the fair:

A group of people eating breakfast around 10:30. Pretty normal right? The guy standing there talking to them was having a beer.

Having cheese curds at 9:30 in the morning.

A food stand advertising "lamb" outside the sheep barn. I don't understand people's desire to eat the live animal they have just seen. I am never like, "look at that sheep, wish I could eat me some of that." This also is the norm outside that pig barn and the cattle barn.

A guy I was buying candied apples from asking me if I was planning on getting into a fight later. Apparently on the midway candied apples are considered a weapon.

I was about to "vote" with a kernel of corn. An old guy said, "gimme some corn I wanna vote for McCain. Which ones for McCain?" (They are clearly labeled) "I wouldn't want to vote for that damn Obama!"
So I said: "Don't worry, I'll vote for Obama for you."
I don't know if he heard me, but the guy giving out corn thought it was pretty funny.

That's all I can think of right now, I'm probably going back tomorrow so I'm sure I'll have another fair post soon.

Patriot Act-ing

2008-08-13T16:32:00.000-07:00

Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary defines patriotism as:
Pa·tri·ot·ism: love for or devotion to one's country.

I prefer Oscar Wilde's definition:
"Patriotism is the virtue of the vicious."

Last night I had a surreal experience. Before I get to that let me explain the back story.

When 9/11 happened I lived in Cedar Rapids and worked at Buffalo Wild Wings. Every Thursday was Karaoke night. It was a fun time with big rowdy groups, and always got a little crazy. One night a few months after 9/11 things seemed well on there way to the usual chaos. Then a strange thing happened. A little boy, six years old, got up to sing. He perched on a bar stool and soulfully belted out Lee Greenwood's "Proud To Be An American". I dutifully walked around trying to get drink orders, but no one spoke. When I asked people if they needed anything they would just lift a finger, a silent shh on their lips. Some were openly crying. I finally just stopped and watched, wondering why I wasn't as moved as everyone else clearly was. When he finished the crowd erupted, then things got back to normal.

Seven years later I'm back at Buffalo Wild Wings, this time just a customer. I of course want to watch baseball. Everyone else, it seems, is there for the Olympics. Groups of men in their twenties, another in their late thirties are suddenly experts on gymnastics, and can tell a breaststroke from a freestyle. The whole place erupts when America does well, and more disturbingly, when another country does poorly. These are guys that probably never went to their daughters ballet recitals, yet something brings them out on a Tuesday night to cheer for people they had never met, the only connection being that they happen to exist in the same country.

Am I the only one that doesn't get this? And wouldn't it have been more patriotic to be cheering for what I was watching, good old American baseball?

random weekend doings

2008-08-12T08:22:00.000-07:00

I don't have the Internets at home, so posting on the weekend is a bit difficult. I'm also quite lazy. Here are some things that happened to me this weekend:

I realized I was reading Vegetarian Times while eating a double cheeseburger. Awkward.

I went to a wedding reception that was wildly awesome, oh and guess who the brides step father was. The CEO of Wendy's (actually a company that owns Wendy's and I think Arby's among other things). He makes about fifteen million dollars a year.
He and his wife sat and looked on as rowdy east siders made good use of the open bar. Thanks Bob!

Saturday I hung out with my sister and four year old nephew. He does entertaining things like wildly waiving his light saber while chanting, "lets cut open the cats belly!"

I took Monday off to do stuff for school and went to lunch with my mom. Julie and I had a potluck dinner and it was great! I can't wait for lunch to eat leftovers.

That about sums it up. What did you do this weekend?

belonephobia

2008-08-06T17:36:00.000-07:00

According to dictionary.com belonephobia is defined as:

bel·o·ne·pho·bi·a An abnormal fear of sharply pointed objects, especially needles.

I have this. It's a problem, it's getting worse, but I don't really know what to do about it.

All kids hate shots, but I was always terrified. Around elementary school I was getting a vaccine in my leg, my dad was holding my arms but I kicked the nurse anyway. She let go of the syringe, so it was still stuck in me. Then the doctor yelled at me. Things haven't gotten better. I'm at a point where I don't go to the doctor if I think a needle will be involved. I have, on more then one occasion, refused to have blood drawn. I have to sign waivers. Last year I needed an IV. It took four nurses to hold me down.

I couldn't sleep last night b/c I have a doctors appointment in 23 days. An appointment that I'm pretty sure won't involve needles. But what if it does? This is what happens to me:

If I go in unaware of needle like procedures, and then they want to perform needle like procedures on me, I just can't do it. I need time to wrap my mind around it, weeks of anxiety to prepare myself. An unplanned needle situation is a recipe for a full blown panic attack. Seriously.
A planned needle situation isn't much better. There's shaking, crying, hyperventilating. The most seasoned nurses usually bolt out of the room as soon as it's over.

I once knew I was going to get blood drawn at the doctor. 100% it was going to happen. For weeks before I would tell myself as I went to bed, "16 more days until you go to the doctor and get blood drawn, and it will be okay." I brought juice, I made a snack. I was prepared. I went into the office and the doctor said he needed a blood sample. I burst into tears. Literal sobbing. I staggered out without a needle touching me, and I never went to that office again.

I could go on and on with needle stories, a new one just happened today. But the more important question is how much is to much? How much can something alter your life before it becomes a "problem". And if it is one, what should I do about it?

i hate snakes

2008-08-06T10:22:00.000-07:00

I may have accidentally dressed like Indiana Jones today. I didn't realize it until after I picked out my outfit, and I was to lazy to change.

Darker then average khakis? Check
Off white button up that is slightly wrinkled with sleeves rolled to elbows? Check

If anyone feels like bringing me a leather jacket or a whip that would be awesome.

Indiana Jones: The hell you will. He's got a two day head start on you, which is more than he needs. Brody's got friends in every town and village from here to the Sudan, he speaks a dozen languages, knows every local custom, he'll blend in, disappear, you'll never see him again. With any luck, he's got the grail already.

Later:

Indiana Jones: Come on, dad. Help me get us out of here. We have to get to Marcus before the Nazis do.

Professor Henry Jones: But you said he had a two day head start. That he would blend in, disappear.

Indiana Jones: Are you kidding? I made all that up. You know Marcus. He once got lost in his own museum.

who does that? oh right, me.

2008-08-05T17:27:00.000-07:00

Since I'm telling dumb stories about myself I thought this one should be added as well. It's from a few years ago, but I was just reminded of it tonight. I'm at my friend Julies and she was telling me about how her three year old spilled laundry detergent all over the carpet.

At my old apartment I was doing laundry one day and was taking the basket out of the laundry room. I noticed a red liquid stain on the side. Thinking nothing of it I wiped it up with my finger and licked it!
Who does that? My only excuse is that for some reason I thought it was jelly. Never mind that I do not own jelly, or that even if it was jelly who licks jelly of a laundry basket?

Needless to say it was not jelly, and I got slightly ill. What was it? I have no idea. It didn't really have a taste, and kinda made my tongue numb. When I called my parents for some sympathy, and adult advise on whether or not I needed to call poison control, they could not have been more appalled. Let's keep in mind I was 24 at the time. Perhaps if I had been 2 they would have understood better...

I learned my lesson that day, and now I'm passing it on to you. Do not lick strange things you find in your apartments laundry room, it's just a bad idea.

oh, really?

2008-08-05T17:12:00.000-07:00

I've started a few posts this week, but none have turned out well, so I decided to just tell a story about me being a dumb ass. Most of you may have heard this one, but I like it and felt it was blog worthy.

It's been established that technology and I don't mix, so when I bought an I Pod a few months ago no one was more surprised then me. I've used it exactly three times. My most recent was a few weekends ago at the local pool. I keep it hidden, sure someone will spot me for the technology posed that I am. As I was adjusting the volume someone noticed it and asked me about it, that led to the following conversation:

Dude: "Is that the I Pod touch?"

Me, internally: "Hmm, it's an I Pod, I touch it to make it go..."

Me to dude: "Yes"

Dude: "Really? Do you like it?"

Me: "Well, I'm not that good at this stuff, but yeah."

Dude: "What are you listening too?'

Me: "This American Life"

Dude: "Who are they?"

Me: "It's a show on NPR"

Dude: "Oh"

Conversation effectively killed.

Me later to my brother: "I have an I Pod touch, right?"

Bro: "Um...No. It's a classic."

Me: "Oh, I thought because I touched it to make it go..."

Bro: "........." Accompanied with look of pity and horror.

Book Review- Breaking Dawn

2008-08-04T09:17:00.001-07:00

Don't read if you want to read the book!

The final book in the Twilight series came out on Friday at midnight. Lot's of you might not be familiar with this series. It's possible that you are how I once was; mocking and judgemental of the fools who could get caught up in a book about teenage vampire love. You are so so wrong. While I agree this series may not be for everyone, most people I've talked to that read it absolutely love it. Including me. That's what led me to pre-order the fourth and final book, and pick it up at 12:30 Friday night/Saturday morning. That's why ever time I looked at it in the next 24 hours I kind of giggled insanely, not believing it was finally here.

I finished it Sunday afternoon. It is 768 pages. I did do other things besides read last weekend. I went to breakfast with my dad, Festa Italiana Saturday night. The grocery store Sunday morning, and watched some of the Yankees game that afternoon at my grandma's house. I probably wouldn't be so desperate to get it done, but I work around people who are reading it, and I didn't want to find out anything about it before I was finished.

I liked it. It's not getting the best reviews online, and I think it lacked some of the feeling of the first three books. It had some more adult themes and sometimes I felt like the author was pushing her views a little. She's a Mormon. It was long but I obviously never lost interest. I will say that of the four books in the series, this was probably my least favorite, but I love them all so that isn't really saying much.

If you ever want to feel a little like a teen again, read this series. If you are reading/or have read it let me know what you think.

Have you ever...?

2008-07-31T11:50:00.000-07:00

I did something on Monday night that have always been curious about. Something I was raised not to do, and my parents were a little disappointed in me...

I went to a shooting range. And it was awesome.

Now, I know what your thinking, the girl who cannot work a remote should not be allowed to operate firearms, and I agree. Frankly, I'm shocked they let me drive a car. But it's something I have been curious about for awhile so I decided to give it a go. I went with the dad of someone I work with, and, having never met me, he seemed to trust I wouldn't kill anyone.

I had never held, shot, or been around guns at all. Needles to say when he opened the gun case, took out his Smith and Wesson revolver, loaded it and then wordlessly handed it to me I was a little shocked. I gingerly took it and began shooting.

It was fun, thought I was nervous the whole time. I felt comfortable shooting, but after each round I felt an instinctual urge to get the gun far, far away from me.

I still would like to own a gun (I will explain later my certainty of the coming apocalypse), but I find gun culture is something that's not easy to break into. A super liberal 5'2 girl that is an atheist, and a wanna be vegetarian doesn't exactly blend in a world of cameo pants and Huckabee posters.

Perfect example: My tutor wanted to illustrate something for me, so he asked for a pen. I quickly grabbed one from my purse and handed it to him. As he wrote I had to stifle my laughter. He used the top of his gun case for a table, on it a large sticker proclaimed "proud member of the National Rifle Association" he was drawing me a picture of a gun barrel. The pen I had given him? It read:

"Proud Supporter of Planned Parenthood"

Irrational Me

2008-07-30T07:31:00.000-07:00

I was talking to a friend the other day about technology. A phrase I repeat frequently is "I hate technology." But that's not really true, I just don't understand it. And that makes me angry.
I'm bringing this up for several reasons, first I deleted my blog last week because I was mad. Mad that I had to take the time to update it, mad that people weren't commenting, mad that I was even blogging. How cliche. But I kinda like blogging, and who cares if people don't read it or feel the need to comment? So for now I'm a blogger.

Secondly I frequently feel the need to share the dumb ass things that happen to me, and what better place then this? So last night when I realized what an idiot I am I thought, "I have to blog this." And so I am.

For about three years I have not had a remote to my TV, and my DVD remote only works sometimes. This causes problems when I want to watch say, the third episode on a disc and can't navigate the menu. Sometimes the default is play all, in which case I can hit the play button on the machine and skip through all the episodes. But sometimes the default is on a particular episode, and won't advance without the remote, or it's defaulted to play commentary, crazy things like that. As you can imagine this has let to frustration on my part, cursing, throwing things, possibly tears. Yet I never thought to buy a new remote, or DVD player, or, apparently, change the batteries. Yes, last night I wanted a Wonderfalls fix, but my remote wasn't cooperating. After some angry words I spied a small radio I use to listen to baseball. I saw the radio, I saw the remote with its batteries strewn about the room (it may have been briefly air born), and I thought, "this might be crazy enough to work." And it did.

Three years of DVD frustration and I'll I needed to do was get two AA batteries. I hate technology.

OOPS

2008-07-30T07:23:00.000-07:00

So, I got mad at blogging and deleted it. Now I'm back, but I lost my old posts. So I guess I will just start over. Hope you keep reading and I'll explain more soon.